Playing around with music

I've been trying to teach Aaron how to sing and he's been making some good attempts. The tune is not always recognizable but he's learning the words very fast.

So what does he sing? Thomas & Friends, Wiggles songs, You are my sunshine and all the usual children's songs. I don't know what I was thinking but I thought it would be funny to have him move around like Barry Manilow. So, he also knows Copacabana. My father had one of his line dancing CDs in the car and the second song on there was 'If you wanna be happy' by Jimmy Soul. Aaron now refers to this as his favorite song. In case you don't know the song, here are the words to the chorus.

"If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life,
Never make a pretty woman you wife,
So from my personal point of view,
Get an ugly girl to marry you"

You can't imagine how funny it is to watch and hear a 2 year old sing along to these lyrics. I've got to try to get a video of Aaron singing this. Keep it for his wedding day maybe?

Today, I've been trying out various types of music on Aaron. We've listened to Elvis, The Beach Boys, Gwen Stefani, The Vienna Boys Choir, Rolf Harris, some Chinese songs and a little orchestral music. He's already familiar with some of the Rolf Harris songs so his reaction there was expected. For the other music, only Elvis seemed to get a reaction out of him. He actually got up and jumped around. He noticed the other music but it mustn't have been catchy enough to make him stop what he was doing.

I think I'm going to allocate set times during the day to play the different types of music. If he's not exposed to them all, they won't have equal chance of getting liked by him. I know some are naturally going to be more catchy (lets say Elvis over Schubert) but in time, I hope Aaron can appreciate it all.

Aaron's first trip to the barber

It only costs RM 5 (USD 1.50) for Aaron to go to the barber here in Ipoh. This is my father's regular guy and for adults its RM 12. My brother also stopped by here for a haircut last week. The both of them came back looking decent so we all went along to let Aaron have his first haircut by a professional.



He was as still as a statue as he observed everything. Didn't even blink his eyes. That lasted for exactly half the haircut. The second half was all about exploration. Trying to see what the barber was doing, trying out all the other chairs, looking in the mirrors....you can imagine. The end result wasn't too bad, only a little lopsided.

I saw this at the side of the mirrors. What do you think its been brushing?!

Have you ever seen this much Lego?

I certainly haven't. This box was generously given to Aaron by one of my cousins. It is just one of 3 boxes of Legos that I'm going to 'ration' out to him.



He was pretty hyped up about all the little bits an pieces in here. The surprising part was that I was even more excited than him. I'm going to have so much fun building stuff. I think my lack of interest as a child could have been because there just weren't enough pieces to be mixing and matching. I know, Lego sets are expensive and its not that I needed any more toys when I was growing up.

This huge present from my cousin is going to save me THOUSANDS of Ringgits and provide Aaron and me with hours of fun. I'm even looking forward to sorting all the pieces out. Y'know, trying to work out which ones were originally part of the same set.

Today has been a great day. We got to the box of Legos at the end of the day and had so much fun with it I really didn't want to put him to bed. Earlier in the day, we spent some time shopping with my mother. Aaron was super energetic the whole time but we had an incredibly enjoyable time at the mall. He's really becoming a little companion that I can have conversations with and enjoy things together with. We did use the Naughty Square once today but there were no hard feelings. He went to bed after giving me hundreds of little kisses and cuddles mixed in with sighs of contentment.

The Naughty Square

I think I've mentioned before that Aaron seems to have sudden spurts in his development each time we go on a holiday. This trip is no different and I'm of course the proud mother, marveling at all the new things he's learning.

I'm also fast becoming an exasperated mother because he seems so much more uncontrollable here than in Palembang. Our routine in Palembang never changes and I guess he just knows what to expect next. And, also knows whats expected of him.

Over here, we have different routines daily, we meet different people and are in different places throughout the day. He has had several mini tantrums and has developed an annoying habit of ignoring instructions. This is especially true if there are other people (like my parents) around. He's still manageable 80% of the time if I'm alone with him.

So today, we have started to give him a 2 minute Time Out. There is a dedicated 'Naughty Square' in the house and we tried it out for the first time today. I'm not sure if he understands the whole concept but he definitely got more upset after we kept putting him on that square. I don't know whether to interpret this as him learning a lesson or just him getting very confused, hence upset.

I keep hearing about the infamous 'Terrible Twos' and felt I had to do something to prepare for it all. I believe that my parents smacking me did me some good but I'm going to try not to do that with Aaron because he has already smacked me back once when I did something he didn't like. So, the Time Out seems to be something that many parents claim to work (and about the only thing I remember from Supernanny episodes). Of course, I have no idea if it actually works at this age but its worth a try.

T-Shirt Marker Pen-ing

A couple of days ago, Aaron was invited over to the Kims house. I was thrilled when I got the SMSed invitation but was hesitant to go because it mentioned T-shirt painting and I could just see him walking all over their house putting his little hand prints everywhere. Well, they were smarter than that. It was actually T-shirt drawing with permanent markers. And it was FUN.

He did the front and I did the back:


There were about 6 other Korean children there and the activities were led by two Korean college girls who had taken a year off to travel around Indonesia. Supposedly, they have been visiting all the Korean communities and organizing a couple of days of kids activities at each of their stops. Aaron even got presents at the end of it all - a whole big stack of Korean snacks (guess who'll be eating those?) and a Magna Doodle board. I tried to pay them in the form of a Chinese Red Packet but they returned the money (keeping the Red Packets) saying that they had sponsors.

This year is really turning out to be a year of new friends and new activities for us here in Palembang!

Photostory Friday - He's NOT balding!

Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

This was taken in January 2007 when Aaron was about 5 months old. Obviously, he was balding but at the time, I just couldn't see it.

I'm serious. Everybody would ask me what happened to him and I'd look at him and wonder what they were talking about. I could not see it. He was still the cute little baby with a head full of hair. Everybody must have thought I was in denial or something because I'd always say "He's not balding. I don't see any difference."

I really wasn't denying anything. For a long time, I just couldn't see that he only had that thin furry layer on top.

Its funny how the brain is able to process the image such that it matched what I had stored in my mind instead of showing me reality. I hope I'll be able to recognize other more serious things in the future like me spoiling him too much or him acting out unnecessarily. It would be terrible if I just continued to see the things I liked to see....

A mouse, a bird and a boy

Wow! We've had an infusion of excitement into our routine lives these couple of days with three visitors.

Everyday, I put Aaron's high chair near the door so he can look out as he has lunch. Yesterday, I saw a little mouse scamper past. Then a few minutes later, I saw the mouse scamper back in the direction it had come. I thought I saw something in its mouth but I wasn't sure.

A few minutes later, the same thing happened. Back and forth again. This time I was sure there was something in his mouth. And then, much to Aaron's delight, the mouse did the same thing again. This went on several more times before I went out to take a look at what it was picking up but it disappeared. I went back to Aaron and told him the mouse was gone.

I didn't think anything of it until I heard Iwan, our driver, grumbling about something outside. Part of his lunch was missing! That cheeky little rat had broken into his lunch bag and stole almost all his tempeh. Right under my nose!

This morning, a second visitor literally dropped in. This tiny baby bird must have fallen while learning to fly and fell down. Something is wrong with its legs because it can't stand up. We put it on the fence to see if it could fly away but it just fell in the drain, got drenched and started shivering. After drying it out in the sun awhile we fed it some water and powdered corn. It seems healthy now but isn't able to fly yet. I guess we'll have it around a few more days.

Aaron is curious about it and tried several times to pick the bird up but I think he grabs too hard so, I've stopped that. He can just look. I'm a little worried though. What sort of diseases to baby birds have anyway?



And lastly, an old friend came over for an early morning playdate. We met Linmas while out on our morning walk and he followed us home. This was at around 7am in the morning. The both of them seemed to miss each other after not playing together for 3 weeks.

Who's the boss?

As usual, Aaron's development keeps me on my toes all the time. I do enjoy this constant change even though I get dragged down sometimes by that little energy draining being. Part of growing up must be the development of increasingly challenging behavior to make sure that your parents are constantly tested.

One of the latest roles that Aaron has taken is "Guardian of Mama's Belongings". He's still very amicable about this and will diplomatically retrieve my cell phone, or my remote control, or my used plastic bag, or whatever it is that the other person has taken. And by the way, he thinks EVERYTHING is mine :) Its kinda cute and not too hard to deal with.

Next is the Exclusive Rights he thinks he has on me. Yes, I know he's used to having my undivided attention but now, he's started to 'complain' when I have conversations with other people. If I happen to be sitting on the floor at his level, he'll turn my head to face him only. And if I still continue the conversation, he ends up saying "No whatever-the-name-of-other-person, Mama talk to Aaron". Talk about jealousy reigning its ugly head! This one is a little tougher to deal with because its of course not just the talking to other people. Its the doing of anything else that doesn't involve him.

As some sort of extension to his 'Exclusive Rights', I'm now considered the only person that can do anything for him. If I'm not in the room its fine but if I'm there, nobody else is allowed to lift him up into his high chair, change his shirt, brush his teeth, wipe his mouth, take him to the bathroom, feed him, get him a drink, you get the idea. This one is really tiring. Have to nip this one in the butt soon!

I titled this post "Who's the boss?" but really, nobody is. I am not Aaron's boss and I don't want to be. I'm sure he isn't intentionally acting 'bossy' and is just learning about boundaries and where he can assert himself. I suppose each disappointments or frustration he faces will teach him that he isn't the boss either. There are no bosses in this house. Having said that, we still need some sort of order and balance on who gets more say. The balancing act in parenting huh?

His own wheels!

I've been looking out for a tricycle for several months but all the ones I came across were two seater and had a lot of useless ornaments about it. As soon as I saw this one, I grabbed it.



He looks pretty happy on it doesn't he? That photo was taken a few days ago. Guess who is more excited about it now? Him, or me? I've been so enthusiastic about teaching him to pedal but he hasn't got the hang of it yet. And he also doesn't seem to know how to just walk himself along while seated.

I guess this is going to be an indoor tricycle for now because I'm definitely not going to fall into the trap of pushing this along the road outside. Its hard enough doing it on a smooth surface in a confined area.

Thomas, Percy, James & Aaron

For the past couple of weeks, we've had a new craze in this house: Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends. Aaron has had a couple of these books around for the past six months but never took a keen interest in them. Then, all of a sudden, its Thomas, Percy and James all day long (except for when its The Wiggles). Luckily one of the books is a 6 in 1 book and there is plenty to look at. Personally, those little engines just don't grab me. I also don't think its the engine that is grabbing Aaron either.

In any case, I'm now an expert at drawing trains, making train sounds and improvising household props to make trains. While all the effort seems to be focused on trains, its not actually the trains that are interesting to Aaron. He must be going through some development on recognizing emotion because its actually the faces of all the trains that he's looking at. He doesn't want me to read any of the stories or point out anything else on the pages. All we do is identify if each of the engines are sad, angry, worried, surprised or whatever. We do this page after page after page.

And then, over the past few days, he's started to apply that to the people around him. He keeps looking at my face and then saying 'Mama is happy'. Or when he's done something wrong and even without me saying anything, he now can recognize when Mama is angry. And he'll say it in such a cute way that it ends up diffusing the situation a little. My favorite is when he says 'Mama is sad' and gives me a big hug.

So, Thomas and Friends may seem a little dull at first but they've been very useful in teaching Aaron about the various emotions.

By the way, at first glance, there appears to be just different colored engines. But when you study their faces closely, they all look different and are in fact 'individuals'. I did find that aspect of the books interesting.

Let Us Pray (Part 2)

I've blogged before about Aaron and prayers. So far, he has developed a consistent night time habit of reminding me to say our prayers before he goes to sleep. He'll put his hands together, palm to palm with fingers straight and insist that I do the same. Then he'll switch to having interlocking fingers and I have to do the same.

I say the same prayer every night so that he can get familiar with it. Lately, he's been trying to say it together with me. The funny part is when we say the 'Our Father'.

Here's what he says:

Our farter in heaven
Holy your name
Kingdom come
Will done
Amen

The longest part is when I try to wrap up the prayer. I say a simple "Please bless so-and-so". He insists on naming everybody he knows, including the members of The Wiggles. By the way, he talks about The Wiggles so much that instead of saying Mother Mary, he keeps saying Mother Murray. Murray is the red wiggle!

Expect the Unexpected

21 months of being a mother should be long enough for me to learn about expecting the unexpected. Yet, there are still days, like today that something totally unexpected happens.

Each morning, Aaron and I sit outside in the garden to watch the birds and any other animals or insects that come by. This week, Aaron got interested in some of the pebbles we have and has been picking them up, looking them over, lining them up and just carrying them around.

Today, while he was with the pebbles, I went to fix up the earth in one of my pots. When I turned around, I saw Aaron sitting there, concentrating hard on LICKING THE PEBBLE! I probably over reacted with a loud, high pitched 'NO' but it was just so unthinkable an action at that moment. Why did he have to lick that incredibly dirty and germ filled pebble??

The worse was yet to come. When I took a look at the other lined up pebbles, they were WET! Guess who has been tasting them all?

I had calmed down by then and tried to talk reasonably and rationally to this toddler about why he must not lick his pebbles. In return, I got an intent yet confused stare back from him. In the end, I just said 'No Licking' and put all the pebbles back where they belong. He didn't protest that too much. I guess they weren't all that tasty.

I wonder what unexpected act of curiosity I should expect next?

3 in 1 Submarine, House and Tunnel

I'm preparing Aaron for a visit to the Cuchi Tunnels.



Only kidding....

He grew bored of the Pentagon some time ago but I didn't have any other big boxes to make something new. We bought a new fridge over the weekend, so guess what?!

Aaron now has a house/submarine/tunnel depending on his mood. Sometimes its all three at once. And, not just anybody is allowed inside.

This time, I'm letting him decorate it. These big boxes are such great spaces for little kids to draw all over, inside and out. He can draw lying down or standing up. He's creating stories as he draws. Its fantastic! I'm having a great time watching him explore this simple cardboard box.

Thursday Thirteen #10

13 frequent phrases/questions from Aaron

1. Where's Aaron?

2. How 'bout that?

3. Other side, thank you, Mama.

4. Sudah makan? (Indonesian for 'Have you eaten?')

5. We're there!

6. Anthony drives Big Red Car. Anthony eating. (The blue Wiggle, Anthony, seems to be his favorite and he constantly says Anthony this and Anthony that)

7. Are you done?

8. What did you do?

9. No pram. Don't like. Aaron walk.

10. Apa ini? (Indonesian for 'What is this?')

11. Go outside.

12. Mama play with you. (He means 'Mama play with me')

13. Aaron good boy.

Dressing Little Boys

I thought that having a little boy meant that there would be less fuss about what to wear. Certainly, its been the case so far. And while the shopping has been more challenging, since stores only stock about 20% boy's stuff versus the 80% cute, pretty, adorable and attention grabbing girl's stuff, it has at least been relatively inexpensive.

Usually, when its time to get dressed, I'll say something like "Lets see what we can wear today". Recently, Aaron has been answering that with either "Let me see" or "Aaron pick". And, surprise surprise, he's quite fussy!

He has his favorites and tries to pick the same ones every day. He has even tried getting them out of the dirty laundry basket. I don't ask him what he wants to wear anymore. Previously, it was just a question that I didn't expect an answer to, more like talking to myself. But now, he will inevitably answer "Wiggles Shirt!". Thats the No. 1 favorite.



He also zooms in on whatever new clothes there are. Maybe new clothes are like new toys.....NEW. On a couple of mornings, he has asked to change out of what he was already dressed in when he saw something else he wanted. Needless to say, I didn't fall for that trick. He'd have me changing him all day long if I did it just the once!

Fun Monday Hangover

Yesterday's Fun Monday post got me thinking about my last moments. Initially, I thought I didn't have a problem at all with dying. My only regret about leaving would be that Aaron would lose the one person that he feels completely secure with. We have been trying to get him to go to Richard for comfort but so far, its still just me. I know its because I am the constant in his life and Richard only spends a little time in the morning and at lunch with him each day. If anything were to happen, it will be rough on Aaron but I know he'll adjust. I hate to think of the agony that he'll have to go through while adjusting. So now, in a roundabout kind of way, I guess I do have a problem with leaving.

An even more morbid thought than the one above is if anything were to happen to Aaron. I don't think I would be able to adjust. Several nights ago, I had a dream (more like a nightmare) where Aaron was taken away by another family. As if that wasn't bad enough, I spent some time during the day imagining things even worse than that. Imagining these horrible situations stirred up such vivid and even physical feelings. This must be how parents feel when they say they would 'do anything' for their child. In my brain, I've always known that as a mother, I will always protect Aaron. However, I never realized how deeply I felt about this and how much worry it generates. Maybe I have slow mother instinct development and I've been taking things for granted.

Suddenly, almost over night, I have heightened paranoia over kidnapping, disease, and accidents. Who will I call? Which hospital would I rush to? Would I rush to the airport instead? If there are no flights to KL, I'll have to find flights to Singapore. But that means I have to go via Jakarta. Would it then mean that I should just wait until the next flight to KL? Do I go into this panic mode for broken bones as well? OR is that over reacting? Would they still let us fly if he gets dengue?

A glimpse of "Why?"

Before Aaron started talking, I, like any other mother, tried to encourage him as often as possible. I remember my mother saying something like "Enjoy the quiet time now. Before you know it, it'll be "Why Why Why" all day long". Well, he's not at that stage yet and without knowing what the future holds or what I'll be thinking at that time, I say this: "I wouldn't mind it at all since it means he is curious and anxious to learn about this world."

I remember an annoying little boy who used to ask that very question ALL THE TIME. He used to annoy the heck out of all my friends with his cheeky antics and his endless "Whys". I think some of them were ready to choke him to death! Anyway, that boy was my brother.

Last night as Aaron and I lay down for bed, and I asked him to close his eyes, he asked "Why?"

Amanda: Because its time to sleep.
Aaron: Why?
Amanda: Because its late.
Aaron: Why?
Amanda: Because its dark outside.
Aaron: Moon is out. Why?
Amanda: Because it wants you to start dreaming.
Aaron: How?
Amanda: Close your eyes.

Phew! I think the first "Why?" was actually Aaron's first ever "Why?". Immediately, my mother's words and my brother's cheeky face flashed across my mind. And as he asked the subsequent "Whys" I thought it was the start of a big long "Why" cycle that will last for who knows how many months/years!

Funnily, he broke it himself with a "How?" and there were no more "Whys?" last night. Maybe this is the trailer for "The Why years of Aaron"...

Sleeping like a baby

I wonder who coined that phrase "Sleeping like a baby"?

Yes, many people have babies who sleep well, soundly, through the night, peacefully and plenty of other adjectives associated with a good nights rest.

Aaron definitely isn't one of those and never has been. And, the more I read about it, the more I find out that there are plenty of other babies like him in the world. Its comforting to know that we're not alone.

At the beginning, it was as if he didn't have an 'Off' switch. He'd try and try to sleep but it just seemed like he didn't know how to. We got through that stage and he's good at falling asleep now. Its the staying asleep that we still need to work on.

The problem now is with what happens in his little head while he sleeps. Last year, we had many instances of night terrors where he would scream, sometimes with his eyes open, yet not see me and not respond to any form of comforting. Thankfully, those have subsided.

These days, its his normal dreams that interrupt his sleep. Sometimes, its really funny. There have been a few instances where we've heard him laughing and chuckling in his sleep. Other times, he has pushed himself to a sitting position, then actually stood up before flopping back down again. There must be some unpleasant dreams in there as well because he also whimpers and seems frustrated with whatever he's dreaming of. Very often, I find his head wet with sweat and the sheets around his head soaked through. This is with the air conditioning on quite cool.

I've noticed that his good/not-so-good sleep is somewhat cyclical with a couple of weeks of sleeping soundly followed by a couple of rough weeks. Maybe its to do with his normal development cycles. Who knows?

I've often been told that I made the 'mistake' of co-sleeping with him (and therefore teaching him to rely on me) but I actually like having him there. Of course there is the odd night when he's woken me up one too many times but on the whole, its probably just once during my night's sleep and I don't even remember it in the morning. Nothing beats being woken up by a fresh little baby grin and leftover words from his last dream. He literally jumps out of bed each morning and is full of energy and enthusiasm to face his day.

How do I look?

Aaron never misses an opportunity to look at himself in the mirror. Its not just a quick glance. More like a prolonged examination of himself. Thats understandable because he's a toddler and they supposedly like mirrors. So he's excused.



So, how often do you look in the mirror?

I come from a family of opposites on this one. My father never passes up a mirror (or any other reflection) while I think my mother only looks once a day when she brushes her hair. I'll admit that I'm a little like my father but not as extreme. I try to do it while nobody is looking but he'll just openly stand at a mirror and look at himself from different angles. (I hope he's not reading this particular post. HA! HA!)

It seems that looking in the mirror is equated to vanity. I guess in many cases, it is. But there isn't anything overly wrong in that. Is there? We shouldn't need to feel guilty about spending a little time checking ourselves out (as long as we don't end up being one of those self absorbed people). No, I don't spend so much time in front of the mirror that I need this justified. I just find it unnecessary that most people inevitably feel embarrassed if they are caught admiring OR scrutinizing their reflection. So, I'll be signing off now to go examine if my ears are identical and at the same position.

Do mothers need quarterly reports?

I didn't even realize that it was the end of the quarter until I visited John at Out of My Hat. In the old days I would have been glad that the end of quarter stress of checking my 'funnel' for the status of my accounts was over. That seems so long ago. I don't even think in quarters anymore. I'm not sure what I think in these days. Usually, I just drift from day by day. Other times, I feel that my life is now segmented by time spent in Malaysia, Indonesia and Australia. The only milestones I really track these days are Aaron's.

Is it really necessary to constantly set and accomplish goals? I know why corporations need to do it and I also liked that sense of achievement when I was in that environment. But, what about life now? Out of habit, I try to set myself little (and big) goals but its different these days. Its truly an Aaron driven life.

I question myself all the time as to whether this is the right way to be. Then, I question myself again on why I needed to question myself in the first place since Aaron is technically my 'job' now. Its just a different type of job with different deliverables and very unpredictable time frames.

So, I don't exactly have a quarterly report. I just know that things with Aaron have been moving faster than I realized. In the past three months:

Sleep: Progressed from nursing to sleep to nursing THEN sleeping.

Toilet Training: Absolutely no control to Number 1s being caught about 50% of the time. Number 2s are still never caught. I think we're a bit slow in this area.

Mobility: From walking to now running without any breaks. He's been attempting to climb anything that has hand/foot holds. He's trying to jump but he doesn't quite have lift off yet.

Chatter: I counted 132 words on December 30. We're now having little conversations about weird things like his MiMi's (that what he calls my mom) new shoes and the Becak Man.

From day to day, I marvel at each of his new skills but of course don't really notice his transformation from baby to little boy from a more macro level. Its only times like this when I think back to who he was at the beginning of the year to who he is now that it really hits me. Imagine, he's only been around 20 months. If he lives with me until he's 18, there are another 196 months more of developments to (hopefully) marvel at.

Anyway, its a strange job and definitely not one that easily segments into 4 neat quarters a year. For the record, 18 years would have been 72 quarters. Try doing THAT long range plan!